


bury a friend

by smolbunprincess



Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Depression, Drinking to Cope, Gray just wants to help, M/M, Natsu has bad nightmares about E.N.D, Nightmares, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Self-Destruction, Self-Harm, Vomiting, violent nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-03
Updated: 2019-07-02
Packaged: 2019-11-08 21:44:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17989061
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smolbunprincess/pseuds/smolbunprincess
Summary: Following the events of Alvarez, Natsu is suffering from survivor's guilt and a mix of other things. He wants it all to stop, but a certain ice mage won't let him drink himself to death so easily.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> There is inspiration taken from Billie Eilish's Bury a Friend, which gives a good indication of how Natsu is feeling. I do really love Gratsu, and would love to write some more. I am tempted to turn this into a series of Natsu struggling to cope with the aftermath of Alvarez and his own guilt, while also falling for Gray at the same time. Would this be something you'd read? Please let me know!

A bar wasn't exactly Natsu's scene. The booming voices of the public, followed by the deafening music and drunks who had no sense of personal space. No, this really wasn't his scene. It was different in Fairy Tail, they were family and the noise was welcomed.

But this? No, Natsu hated it. But like a drug, he can't quit it.

Ever since the end of their war with Alvarez, nothing was the same. Magnolia wasn't the same, and Fairy Tail wasn't the same. Everyone bared marks following the war, scars left on peoples bodies or inside their heads. Natsu was one of the people who held all. And that's why he's here tonight. Surrounded by the sounds of people partying like hell hadn't already been raised.

His fingers curl around the glass, and he downs the alcohol. He doesn't know what it is, but it burns unpleasantly as it rushes down his throat. It's numbing him, he doesn't feel anything and that was better. Natsu didn't want to feel all that negative shit, he wanted to go back to normal. Wanted to prance around like he was god's gift to the world. But he wasn't, he was a parasite. Something wrong, he was wrong.

His teeth bare, and the grip on his hair tightens. No. He needs another drink, he's still thinking. He needs to stop thinking. Even if he winds up black out drunk and wakes up in an alleyway with no clue what colour the sky was for a solid ten minutes. It needs to stop, it has to.

Natsu sways a little, he was already reaching such a point. The fire mage was admittedly, a light weight when it came to alcohol. And he'd been knocking back the hard stuff like it was water. Even if it burnt, even if it hurt.

He wanted to stop the other hurt.

Natsu squints, looking around as he tries to locate the bartender. Where did he go? Where did he go? He grumbles to himself, unaware of the approaching figure until a hand is on his shoulder. Natsu whips around, smoke already billowing out of the corners of his lips as he readied a drunken roar but it's unneeded. Instead, his eyes meet a certain ice mage's and the smoke dissipates as soon as it arrived.

"Gray.. The hell you doin' here?" He slurred, forcing himself to his feet. His knees feel weak, and they wobble under him. Gray's arms are around him, forcing him to lean against Gray for support. He raises a hand to try and push him away, but the beer saps his strength and it's laid against him.

"Isn't it obvious?" Gray scoffed, pulling Natsu away from the bar. It takes no effort, but he is practically dragging the dragon slayer who seemed uncooperative. "Getting you out of here."

Natsu stumbles out, the cold air causing him to perk up slightly. Since when did it get so cold? Oh yeah, winter was coming and it was gonna get chilly. The drunk narrows his eyes, wondering if somehow he could get the cold to numb him. He's pulled off somewhere else again, and he manages a whiny protest.

Buildings are all around them, some still in the process of repairs but they're approaching a big one. He doesn't recall this building, but it looks like a mixture of fancy and boring. Was there a word for that?

"Borcy."

Gray pauses for a second, giving Natsu a weird look. Natsu reasoned that it was because he was obviously a genius. Even if it was the way he looked at Levy when she announced some weird language that Natsu was sure wasn't translated well, or at all.

He's pushed into the building, before being dragged up a flight of stairs. He's dragged to another door, which Gray unlocks with a key before shoving Natsu inside.

"You're staying here." Gray announced, matter of factly. He's giving Natsu a look he doesn't like, but part of him is too drunk to really care. Or maybe it was that numbing sensation that came sometimes. It made him not care about anything, especially himself.

Natsu isn't sure if he likes that feeling either.

"You kidnapped me."

"No, I actually made sure you didn't wake up in a ditch." Gray snapped back, taking Natsu's wrist and dragging him over to a couch. He forces him down onto it, but no effort is really given to fight back. So Natsu's forced to lay on the couch, and Gray pulls a blanket over him.

"And tomorrow? We're gonna have a serious chat."

\--

_'Your fault..'_

_The voices of many mixed as one echoes in Natsu's ears. Teeth sink into him, sharp and dull all at once. It doesn't hurt, but it does as well. Things curl around him, but they're so dark Natsu can't tell what they are._

_'It's all your fault..'_

_The smell of blood hits him like a truck, and all of a sudden a sharp pain courses through his body. Natsu staggers back, one hand over his left eye and he looks down to see blood rising to his ankles. Body parts bob in the water, too bloodied to see what they are or who they belonged to. Eyes roll to face him, staring at him._

_Judging him._

_'All your fault.'_

_Red eyes stare at him, mocking him. More roll into view, eyes of differing shades and emotions. Familiar and not. Monsters in the distance wade through the blood like it's their home, fixated on him. They whisper, they call but they're merely static in the growing roar._

_'My sweet little brother.'_

_From the darkness, a mirror is brought into view. From it, he sees himself but it's not him but it also is him. Dark marks hug his skin like it's home, horns sprout from his skull and it looks like his skin was porcelan but someone took a hammer to it. He doesn't have eyes, he can see but there is only the void where brightness was._

_'My little E.N.D'_

_And suddenly, the voice changes. From the mirror, a hand emerges. It holds black markings he knows, and it's making him weak. It feels like everything around him is fading. The red becomes static, a buzz fills his ears until a single shrieking voice pierces him._

_' **THAT NO MATTER WHAT, I WOULD DEFEAT E.N.D.'**_   
**_'I WILL, DESTROY E.N.D'_ **

Natsu scrambles, he moves and he flees. He doesn't know where he's going, until he's grabbing a door and flinging it open and clinging to an object like its the only safety in his wretched life. His stomach heaves and suddenly, Natsu's vomiting into a toilet in an unfamiliar room with a familiar smell.

He heaves, feeling whatever he'd eaten leave his body to the porcelain black hole. Natsu fumbles, gasping for air as he grabs the handle and flushes. His ears roar with static, and as he stares at himself in the mirror he doesn't know what he sees.

Wide panicked eyes, tears streaming and the dark circles under his eyes could rival Gajeel's fashion sense. He's pale, he's so pale and it's so dark. Slowly, gripping the bathroom counter Natsu peers around the bathroom he'd escaped to. It was dark, it wasn't his but he didn't know what that really meant. His head is still reeling from the nightmare, and a dull ache fills him.

There's a sudden click, and light floods the room. It takes him off guard, and with a yelp Natsu falls to the floor and curls in on himself. He hears his name being called, and a hand is on his arm. It's cold, and it's shaking him. Another is trying to remove his arms. Trying to force it's way in, force him open.

"Natsu! Natsu! It's me! It's Gray, you're safe!"

He falters, before slowly pulling his arms away. Natsu peered at Gray, taking in the pale features of the other. He looked scared, Natsu could tell why but he doesn't want him to. And he doesn't want him looking at him like that either.

The concept of being safe is a foreign one. Not real. Completely fake. Natsu wasn't safe, because he was still here. It meant something of Zeref's clutches still held on in the world, and if he was still here then the dark wizard couldn't be gone.

Right?

"You're safe." The repeated statement drags Natsu back to reality, and he has a look that Natsu doesn't like. Cold fingers gently brush along his shoulders, pressing in like a lazy massage. An attempt to ground him.

"You're not."

Natsu's response catches Gray off guard, and he recoils before giving Natsu a confused look. Natsu watches as he peered around, as if there was something in the room. He thinks Gray is being silly, the threat is right in front of him.

"I don't see anyone that could cause me any issues." Gray states, matter of factly and Natsu wanted to punch him. He spoke like he already knew, but what did Gray know? Jack shit, that's what! "I do see someone who has a lot of explaining to do."

Natsu grunts, pressing his hand to the ground and forcing himself to sit upright. The world around him spins and he gasps quietly. He falls forward, and Gray pulls him close. The action means Natsu's in his arms, on his lap and completely trapped. Natsu swears it was on purpose, and not just a friendly way of keeping him upright.

"Natsu.." Gray starts with a worried kind of tone, and Natsu looks away stubbornly. "Natsu, you only show up in the guild to grab jobs. You never stay for long, you never talk for long and just walk off the moment someone is distracted. The only reason I found you tonight is because I asked Happy where you were. What the hell is going on in that head of yours?"

Absolutely nothing, and if there was then it wasn't any of Gray's business. It was no-one's business. It was just his and no-one else's so logically everyone should just butt out. He thinks such a thing is a reasonable desire, but when he looks at Gray again whatever agitation he has seems to for the most part, fizzle out.

Dark eyes, laced with concern and worry met breaking olive. Natsu never felt so small in his life. The truth is on the tip of his tongue, but before he could even say anything his stomach churns with a nauseating feeling.

The salamander is barely able to escape Gray's grasp before puking his insides into the toilet. A cold hand rubs soothing circles on his back, and when he's sure he's done Natsu pulls away with a gasp.

"What's it.." He gags. "To you.. Ice princess?"

"Well, you're puking in my toilet for starters." Gray pointed out, folding his arms as he keeps his gaze locked on Natsu. "It doesn't take a genius to know that you don't drink, to this point of being drunk, unless something is wrong."

"Maybe I jus' wanted to spice things up.." Natsu slurred, squinting at Gray as if daring him to try and disagree. Whatever threatening look he could have had is gone when Gray puts his hands on Natsu's waist and hoists him up.

"Geez, you're light.. Have you been eating at all?" Gray began looking him over, and Natsu tries to cover himself with his arms. He doesn't want Gray's eyes on him, not like this.

"I did just vomit." Though, it didn't take a genius to figure out that his statement was bullshit. Natsu had been skipping some meals, opting to lay in bed and wallow in his misery. Let the numbness claim him, feeling like nothing mattered while his brain continuously killed him.

Gray shakes his head, taking Natsu into the living room. He sets him down on the couch, and sat down next to him. Natsu located the discarded blanket, pulling it over himself as a shield. It was soft, it gave the salamander a small feeling of safety and he could almost fade into it.

Gray's hand is on his lap, and a few seconds pass before Gray does it again. He pulls Natsu into him again, setting the fire mage on his lap. Natsu doesn't complain, the feeling of cold is soothing even if he does feel like a train wreck. Slowly, Natsu relaxes a little more and snuggled into Gray.

"I'm scared."

Gray raises an eyebrow, stroking Natsu's back gently with one finger. He traces patterns, and Natsu shudders a little. "Why is that? Why're you scared?"

"'cause.. I'm bad." Natsu's fingers tighten around the blanket, balling it in his fists. "I made everyone hurt. Everyone.. You.. And so many others. Zeref did all those bad things 'cause I died back then."

"Natsu, it isn't your fault." Gray sighed softly, but there is a tenderness in his tone that Natsu hadn't been expecting. He didn't sound exasperated, rather.. Worried? "Zeref did those things of his own free will. No-one blames you at all for what he did. No-one at all."

He grumbled quietly, and shook his head. Gray was wrong, he was. He had to be. He had to be. Because this was Natsu's fault, it was his fault he didn't end the war before his friends would get more hurt. Happy wouldn't wake up some nights crying, people wouldn't be suffering. There wouldn't be scars on the city that may never heal.. The book of Zeref wouldn't have been created, there wouldn't be demons that terrorised the world.

Natsu whimpers, and Gray held him a little more securely. He wants to scream, and he wants to cry. The feeling of guilt he had tried to drown through alcohol was beginning to squirm in his empty stomach. He's going to drown in these feelings, or to be consumed by that feeling of unkind numbness.

"No-one, blames you." Gray insists, bringing a hand to the back of Natsu's head. "No-one at all blames you. Everyone in Fairy Tail, everyone of us would move the earth if it meant bringing you back to us."

"But I'm a monster.."

"No, you're Natsu. You're Fairy Tail's light." The ice mage assures him this, looking down at Natsu. He doesn't look back. He doesn't want to. He's afraid. "You're our nakama. You're one of us.."

"But I feel like it's my fault. It feels like it every day! Every time I roll out of bed!"

"Then I'll tell you. Every single day." Gray insisted, taking Natsu's chin and forcing him to look at him. There's an intensity in his eyes that Natsu isn't used to, and he feels his cheeks darkening slightly. It's just the alcohol, right? "I'm not gonna lose you Natsu. I won't. You're not getting away from us that easy."

Natsu remains still, he doesn't realise that he's crying until Gray brushes his hand along his cheek. He doesn't know how to respond besides raising his arms and hugging Gray's neck. Gray holds him close, murmuring soft things to him.

Natsu doesn't know how long they were there for. He doesn't really remember.

He doesn't want to remember, but he wants to disappear.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Its the morning after. Happy visits, and Gray has a shower.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've read your comments, and I'm gonna try writing this! I'm sorry if the quality isn't that great and if there is some inconsistencies, I am trying to write this to the best of my ability. It will generally follow Natsu's perspective, but I may throw a bit of Gray in there every so often.  
> Natsu's daydream takes inspiration from this piece: http://selenba.tumblr.com/post/143313891141/remember-your-death-remember-youre-already-dead by selenba!

A pounding headache, and the whispers of others awaken Natsu. He tugs at what he's holding, pulling something over his head. His head hurt, and the salamander wants it to stop. It was the cost of trying to drown everything, and he knows he'll end up back there again.

He notices then that the sound of people talking had stopped, and he slowly raises his head. The blanket over his head slipped down a little, and he meets the gaze of Happy.

"Natsu!" He puts his paws on the sofa cushion, watching Natsu with a soft gaze. The mage sits upright, letting the blanket fall to his lap. The exceed proceeded to jump onto his lap, and Natsu moves instinctively to embrace him.

Happy's fur relaxed him slightly, the feeling of his best friend being here did reassure him a little and whatever the building buzz in his mind disperses. But this is only temporary, when he wakes up more it'll be back.

It never stops, Natsu's exhausted.

"Hey, Natsu. How're you feeling?" Its then that Gray came into view. He crouches, his piercing gaze on Natsu and Natsu alone. It made him shudder, he wants it to stop.

When Natsu doesn't respond, Gray sighed. He reaches, and laid his hand on his knee. Natsu jolts, looking at Gray with his teeth just slightly bared. Happy presses his paw a little more onto the male's arm, and he lets out a shuttered exhale.

"I'm.. I'm fine.."

Gray gives Natsu a look that tells him that he doesn't believe it, but mercifully doesn't question it. He stands instead and stretches, his bones cracking in the process which earns a satisfied sigh.

"Right. Well, I'm gonna hop in the shower. Do you need anything first?" He watches Natsu, who shakes his head and instead pulls Happy closer. He nods, and heads towards the shower.

With Gray gone, Natsu decided to peer around. Gray's apartment, he doesn't know if he's been here before. It's pretty normal, Natsu doesn't think much of it. He notices that it seems rather bare, and thinks for a moment that Gray should invest in more knick knacks.

Or maybe that was the dragon in him, who liked to display memories through collected items.

"Are you really okay?" Natsu looked down at Happy, the little cat sighed and patted Natsu's arm. "You've got that look in your eyes. The one when you've had a bad night.."

Natsu huffed lightly, looking away and instead finding the empty wall to be more fascinating.

"Course I am."

Because he's Natsu. It's a phrase left unsaid, but hangs in the air. Natsu wasn't okay, because he was Natsu. Because he was E.N.D. Because he was the parasite that infected the world, all because he died.

_Dull teeth bury into his shoulder, into his side and through his legs. Skeleton hands reach, dragging and leaving ugly red lines in their wake._

"..tsu?"

_The whispers of the damned come as static. They call to him, they ask him to return. Cold arms wrap around his neck, choking him._

"Natsu!"

_"Don't forget." Words dig into him like the knives he's slashed into his tainted flesh, they ghost past his ears and ruffle his hair like one would to a little child. "You're already dead."_

And then suddenly, he's face to face with Happy again. His breathing is a lot quicker than it should be, heavier and his chest hurt. Natsu reaches to touch his face, feeling that wetness he detested and pulls away with a defeated gasp.

Natsu fell back, the sofa keeping him upright. His eyes trail to his arms, small scars lining paling skin. They're so disgusting, and stung dully. Happy lays his paw on one of the more recent ones, and nothing is said. The sound of the shower fills the air.

"Still hurts.."

"I know." The cat gives him a sympathetic pat, and looks up at Natsu. He looks like he's searching for something, but Natsu thinks he'll find nothing. He's a lost cause, he knows that. He's helpless. "Let's go to the guild."

"Okay."

\--

The only thing Gray can hear is the water hitting him. The shower was loud, but that was what he generally liked. However, at this point he finds it a nuisance and wishes for this to be over as quickly as possible.

He can only think back to Natsu, clutching at his toilet like it was the one thing that would keep him safe. The dragon slayer looked so tiny, looked so vulnerable. It wasn't something Gray liked, and he couldn't help how he felt when he saw him. It was like a protective instinct washed over him, and in that moment the only thing he felt was a need to assure his guild mate.

Gray was worried. That was the best word to describe his current thoughts and feelings. This wasn't Natsu. He was acting in such an odd manner, that if Gray didn't know better it was like he'd been replaced with a doppelganger. He looked like a wreck, to put it lightly. Like he had been on multiple trains before Gray found him, and smashed his head through a wall.

It wasn't natural, it was foreign and something was up. Something was wrong, Gray knew that.

Of course he had been annoyed at first, not knowing why Natsu hadn't been around the guild much and finding him in the bar had just pissed him off more. His anger comes from confusion, and holding Natsu while he cried just solidified that something was wrong.

Gray just wished he'd picked up on this sooner.

He knew he had feelings for the dragon slayer. He was like a ball of sunshine regardless of the weather, always there even when he didn't want it. He wouldn't let anyone suffer alone, he'd let people cling to him when they cried and he didn't bat an eyelash. When Asuka was afraid of the thunderstorm and without her parents to help, Natsu sat under a guild table with her and coloured in a picture with her. He even wrapped his scarf around her head to block out the noise.

It was hard to not have fallen for him. He was as sweet as he could be irritating, but maybe that was because he was so genuine in what he did. The fire mage held his heart on his sleeve, he was the light of the guild and now? Natsu was suffering, and Gray had been blind to it.

They all had.

After the war, no-one was really the same. Wendy walked with a limp, Erza had been bedridden for weeks. Levy was suffering from separation anxiety, and Romeo would tense in large crowds. Gray was having his own issues, battling the guilt he held in his gut knowing that for one moment in time he had genuinely wanted Natsu dead.

But it was over now, and they could recover. It was a sort of blind belief, a piece of knowledge knowing that things wouldn't be the same but they could get through this. Like everything, this was just another bump in the road and soon Fairy Tail would be as chaotic as always. There would be changes, but nothing could change their family.

A room had been made, a quiet area for people to retreat into when things became too much. Many mages' were on a sort of break, working different jobs that didn't involve fighting. Still, they bore the Fairy Tail mark proudly. Makarov was making the guild a safer place, determined that the guild would always be somewhere that members would be able to relax in.

As always, Makarov valued the well being of his children above all else.

Gray turned off the water and stepped out. He drys his hair with a towel, and then the rest of his body. He had brought a change of clothes in with him, figuring that after he got changed he could talk to Natsu about last night.

Natsu needed to open up, it was killing him. He was destroying himself, and Gray briefly wondered if Natsu even realised. He remembers holding him, hearing him whisper about being a monster.

About all of this being his fault.

Gray paused, one hand on his shirt. Was that why Natsu had been avoiding the guild? Did he feel that because of Zeref, he was to blame for this? That he was afraid to meet his guild mates, afraid of what they thought of him?

He softens with a sigh. Stupid Natsu. Of course, how could he be so blind? The whole guild knew that Natsu had a major fear of being abandoned. He did stupid things all the time, just to reassure himself that the guild wouldn't get rid of him if he was useful.

Gray gripped the handle, focusing himself. He wasn't the best at comforting, and he'd probably have to ask Makarov for advice. All he knew that Natsu needed someone, someone to remind him that he's wanted. That Fairy Tail is, and will always be his home.

Nodding, he opens the door with Natsu's name on the tip of his tongue. However, that quickly vanishes when he realises that neither Natsu or Happy where in his apartment.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natsu goes to Fairy Tail.

The buildings of Magnolia stand tall, casting long shadows over the salamander as he walked. Even as a child he never felt so small compared to the buildings, but now he felt that they towered menacingly. They were watching him, like he was about to be executed.

Maybe that's what he deserved. It made sense in Natsu's head.

The usually busy streets were relatively calm, leaving a sinister vibe. He shivers, and quickens his pace. Getting to the guild would shield him from their unforgiving eyes. Yes, he needed to take refugee in the guild. When it got busy, he could leave.. When it was busier, it would mean everyone was there.

It wasn't a ghost town. He wasn't the only one haunting the streets.

A familiar building causes Natsu to stop, and he turns towards the sight. The apartment Lucy lived in. It gives off a warm feeling, reminding him of better times. During her first few weeks, Natsu had broken in there many times. Boundaries were somewhat of a hard concept to grasp, he constantly struggled with it but he'd learnt. He waited by her door, and a few months later he'd been gifted a key.

Lucy had a key to Natsu's home too, it only felt fair.

In his arms, Happy peered up at the building and then at Natsu. His ears twitch, and he touches Natsu's arm to get his attention.

"Are you thinking of going in? I think Lucy's on a mission.."

Natsu paused, and he didn't understand why that took him off guard. Of course she would be, they all had to make money.. Maybe he just thought, hoped that she would be home. He exhales a quiet sigh, watching as the cold air wisps past him.

"Its starting to get cold, maybe you should start wearing sweaters soon." Happy suggested, offering Natsu a smile as he spoke.

"What are you, my mother?" Natsu retorts, an eyebrow raised and a hint of a smile teasing his lips. Happy laughs, moving up to nuzzle his face against Natsu's.

"I'm close enough! Now c'mon!"

Natsu laughs, and he feels light. He continues his walk to the guild, a smile gracing his features the whole time. It's a warm fuzzy feeling that warms his stomach, but it soon disperses as the guild comes into view.

Those feelings of happiness should be heightened at the sight of his family's home, but it gives way to fear instead. He doesn't realise he's shaking a little until Happy pats his arm to reassure him. Reminding him that he wasn't alone.

Forcing a sigh, he kept walking until he reaches the doors. He opens one slowly, the groan causing him to wince slightly. When he peers in, he still expects destruction. He expects death. He anticipates the smell of blood, along with smoke and burning wood.

Instead, a mostly empty guild hall greets him. Cana appears to be nursing a hangover by the bar, with what Natsu presumed to be a mug of coffee in her hands. Mirajane was wiping the bar down, but spotting Natsu she smiles and waves. Makarov was writing something down, and there was a few other members taking up empty chairs. A few were asleep too, it seemed.

Natsu enters the guild hall, a little more cautiously than anticipated and timidly looks around. He's afraid that there is an assailant, but there is only the gentle buzz of people around. Still, Natsu can't help but worry. He needed to be prepared, there could be someone there at any moment. He may not be safe. They all may not be safe, something could _would_ be there.

"Let's go sit by the bar!"

Natsu wants to curse Happy's thought process, but he doesn't. He knows he's going there specifically because there are more people that direction who are awake. He won't let Natsu fester in his own paranoia, and in a tiny way he is grateful.

Slowly, he made his way over to the bar. He chooses a stool that's in the middle, not close to Cana or Makarov. The former acknowledges Natsu with a wave, and he responds with a soft noise. Happy settles in his lap, a satisfied smile on his face and he waves at Mirajane.

The lack of noise throughout the guild causes major unease, but with it Natsu would feel uneasy. A void of noise reflected the brokenness, it mimicked the quiet suffering of those around him. Reminding him, mocking him.

But if loud, then Natsu couldn't detect. He would get overwhelmed, overstimulated. He'd reach a breaking point, unable to focus and listen for someone creeping on him. Instead he'd end up having a panic attack in the bathroom, feeling everything slip through his fingers like sand.

He raises his head at the clink of a drink, and noticed a mug before him. Happy almost instantly starts inspecting it, but the fire dragon slayer can't smell any alcohol. He makes eye contact with Mirajane, who offers a small but sympathetic smile.

"A gift." She assures, pushing it towards Natsu a little. Perhaps she senses his apprehensiveness, or she wants to drive home the fact that this drink was for him. "You seem like you need it. It's just some calming tea."

Slowly he takes the drink, and sips. It's sweet, not overly herb like and doesn't make him gag. It fills his stomach with a calmness that doesn't feel too fake. Not as numbing, or as disgusting as the alcohol he'd consumed the night before.

"Lots'a those bein' served recently." Cana remarks, seemingly revived for the time being. She takes a swig from her own mug, and Natsu realises they're drinking the same drink. She looks at Natsu, giving him a grin. "You must've been out drinkin', I can tell. You look like a wreck."

"Thanks."

Cana laughed at the flat remark, tapping her fingers on the table. She stares into nothingness, and Natsu notices scars on the visible parts of her body. The feeling of static seems to fill his ears, as he focuses without meaning to.

Yet as quickly as it comes, it vanishes. Cana raises her mug to him, and he raises his. "To bein' fucked up!" She laughs, and they clink their glasses together before giving another swig.

"Y'know, it's better for you to drink here than some random bar in Magnolia." Cana points out, her expression is more serious and Natsu isn't sure how he feels about that. He shifts a little, but he's being watched by the two of them. They know. They know. "We'd make sure you don't end up in a ditch."

"Do you have experiences in that field?" Natsu asks, desperate to change the topic. Mirajane laughs a little, and Cana's face grows a little redder before she laughs.

"Some people can wake up on the wrong side of the bed, I have woken up on top of a building with a hat that wasn't mine." She sips at the tea, eyes shut as she reminisces on the past. "Still haven't found the owner."

"We'll make missing posters, and plaster them all around Magnolia. We'll find the owner, there's a cold head out there."

He feels easy, for once. Cana's laughing at the remark, and so is Mirajane. He thinks that everything is going well. Natsu is okay. His head is okay. The darkness isn't there, the numbness isn't there.

But it's still his fault, isn't it. Still his fault that Makarov almost died, still his fault that Fairy Tail may not have made it.

And he wasn't just talking about the hall itself.

But did they make it? Was things okay? Everyone's eyes held vacancy the day after, but it was returning. Life was returning, from the cracks in the street small plants came to reclaim.

Natsu doesn't feel that way. He feels like a shattered mirror. Fragments equal parts dangerous and painful. He sighs, resting his chin on the counter. Happy's fur tickles the side of his cheek, but he doesn't move.

At least, not until...

" ** _NATSU!!!_** "

The male in question bolts upwards, knocking the tea and stool over. He spins around, body tensed and ready to strike out. Instead, Gray was standing in the now open doors of the guild. He stalks towards Natsu, an annoyed facial expression overtaking any hint of gentleness that there was this morning.

Natsu realises then that the drink had been spilled, and he inhales sharply. Shit. _Shit shit shit shit shit._ He messed up, he fucked up. He'd been given a gift, and it was helping him but now it'd fallen and now he'd fucked up. He'd messed up Mirajane's hard work, he'd messed up. **_He messed up._**

His body trembles, his hand tightens on the tabletop of the bar. His breathing comes in sharp inhales and exhales, and he nearly doesn't noticed the quickening footsteps until a cold hand is on his back. Even through his clothes, Gray's magic seeps through. Almost intentionally.

"Shit.. I didn't mean to startle you.."

Natsu doesn't understand what was happening, but the bar stool had been propped up again and suddenly Natsu was sitting in it again. Everything was jumbled together, he could hear quiet thumps and distant sounds.

Drowning.. Was he drowning? Where was the water? Air? Freedom? He reaches out, a cold hand clasps back and Natsu thinks he's finally died.

But static jumbled messes makes way for Gray's concerned face. Inches from his. He thinks he hears a faint snicker in the background. He inhales suddenly, looking down. Gray's hands are holding onto one of his, his thumb rubbing soothing circles on his knuckles.

"Gods.. I'm sorry Natsu. I didn't mean to scare you like that, I didn't know where you went." He sounds.. Apologetic? Why was he? Shouldn't he be laughing? Natsu's head feels like a mess, he feels like it's hammering against his skull. It wants out, it's hurting. "You okay? You need anything? I brought painkillers.. Hey, hey Mirajane! Can you make Natsu some more of that tea?" He turns to Mirajane as he spoke, but she had cleaned up the mess already and set a new one down.

Gray sits down on the bar stool next to Natsu. He passes him two painkillers from a box in his pocket, and Natsu downs them with the tea. He watches him, before offering a small smile. Natsu pauses, unsure but simply nods his head. He can't smile. The static took it.

Natsu doesn't understand Gray. The ice mage ordered a drink too, coffee he believed. He was laughing with Cana, while Happy stayed close to Natsu. Why was he caring so much? Before.. Before he wanted to silence him.

Why was Gray bothering with him?

Why.. Why was he..

Natsu doesn't understand, but he decides to let the idle chatter of the world consume him and he vanishes into his drink.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natsu ends up at a bar again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm awfully sorry for being so slow!! I did want to write, but I just couldn't find a way to start this. I may try to tie this up soon, I'm sorry if this seems a bit rushed! Have some soft Gratsu to help?

Natsu is doing better, that's what he believes.

He has a routine now, he follows it and he continues on. He does jobs, he laughs, he plays and then he goes home. It happens day after day. A continuous path. He drinks the tea with Cana, he jokes with Makarov and when the days turn to nights he goes back home like everything was okay.

Everything was okay, but it wasn't and Natsu knows it was. He was never okay, he was always hurting, he didn't know how to ask for help. But he wasn't okay at all.

He doesn't eat much, he doesn't have time to. He only eats when he's with Fairy Tail. He doesn't rest much, because he was afraid. And it was so stupid in his eyes, but he couldn't. Natsu couldn't. The strong and confident Natsu was afraid of sleeping. He's afraid they'll laugh, so he doesn't.

He keeps going. He'll keep going. He'll always keep going.

Then.

He crashed.

It's 3AM, he's slammed a ridiculous amount of alcohol down. He was shaking, and everything is slipping through his fingers. Natsu feels sick, his head is spinning and the feeling of static envelopes his body. He's floating, but also falling all at once. He stays there, holding the glass in his hand.

The music of the bar feels deafening, and he swears he can feel it in his chest. He forces another beer down. It burns so much that Natsu hopes it'll turn his pain to dust. But it doesn't, and that's why he's here again. And again.

Yet even with the alcohol in his system, he feels like Zeref is still there. Feels like he's still got a hold of him. Natsu looks at his wrists, wondering if he could see the wires. See his skin made to that of a doll, to fit what his brother wanted. Nothing more than a pawn, he'd only been reborn to kill. Not as a second chance.

In a way, it hurts. It gives him a dull sense, makes him feel like he's imploding. All he was, was a monster. He wasn't made to love, he wasn't made to be happy. He was made to kill.

His entire body is a weapon, his hands are meant to hurt. He stares at his hands, his vision is blurry but he can just about make out his hands. He feels disgusted, his body is disgusting. He is a pawn, nothing more and nothing else.

Natsu wants to cry, and he's angry. It was supposed to be going away, but it wasn't. He growls at the alcohol, he wants to throw it away but his arms are heavy. His whole body is. The salamander slumps, his head resting on the table. Tears cling to his eyelashes and he exhales shakily. It won't stop, it won't stop..

A pair of arms wrap around his middle, and he struggles in surprise. His movements are sluggish, not precise and so damn slow its pathetic. He tries to lash out, his speech is jumbled and he can barely understand the words spilling out. His breath hitches when he feels the cold exhale of Gray's breath on the back of his neck and for once he is terrified that he was caught.

Yet he doesn't hear anger. He doesn't hear anything other than the colours of the bar banging in his skull. Natsu can barely make out his own thoughts besides how nice Gray's arms were. He's dragged out, and the sounds dwindle to nothing more than murmurs in the distance. As Natsu stares at the sky, the sky stares back and he feels small again.

Natsu winced when Gray sets him against a wall, and he finds himself having to hug it in order to stand. His legs are wobbly, and somewhere in his drunken state he thinks that he needs a new pair.

"What were you even doing back there?"

He goes to look at Gray, or the Gray's. There looked like there was multiple, but when he squints the numbers dwindle. Lazily, he reaches a hand out trying to find out which was which.

Gray takes his hand, believing him to be distressed. He squeezes his, and Natsu feels assured knowing that he found the right one. He laughs, stumbling forward until he's against Gray. One arm is around Natsu, the other holding his hand. He makes out Gray's sigh from above.

"You're a mess."

"You smell nice."

"C'mon." Gray lets go of his hand, and Natsu whines in protest. The ice mage shifts, managing to get Natsu to look at him. "What're you doing in there? Especially alone? I thought you'd drink with someone at least.."

"I didn't wanna wait for anyone." Natsu mumbles, he puts a hand on Gray's arm to steady himself. His legs felt like they didn't like him anymore. "Felt like I needed it."

Gray cocked his head, before rubbing his arms. He'd keep him close, maybe Gray could see that Natsu's legs didn't like him. He knew that Natsu's body wouldn't like him tomorrow either. "Why did you think you needed it?"

"Hurtin'."

"Where?"

"My head." He reaches to touch his forehead, and then paused before reaching to touch Gray's forehead. "My whole mind keeps being shitty, and I want it to stop."

"Does the alcohol help?"

Natsu paused, squinting and then looking at his hands. Did it help? Well, it did help.. It made things stop. He mumbles inchorently and snuggled into him. Gray let out a confused noise, then slowly seemed to return this. Natsu relaxes with a quiet exhale as cold arms lay on his back.

"Makes me feel nothing.." Natsu mumbled, enjoying the feeling of Gray around him. He feels something in his stomach, and it makes him the tiniest bit anxious. Yet he doesn't move away. "Everything stops for a bit."

"Don't you get sick from it?" Gray's voice sounded so concerned, Natsu found himself growing confused. Why was Gray being like this? He's supposed to hate him. Gray's supposed to want to kill him.

He wanted him dead. He wants him dead.. Doesn't he? Doesn't he?

Natsu pulled away, and while Gray was reluclant to let go he'd keep his hands on Natsu's arms. He'd stare at him, finding the Gray's to double and come together. He'd touch Gray's arm, remembering when the dark marks swirled. He found them attractive, and he found Gray's normal body attractive too.

Why did the attractive guy want him dead? Oh, because he's E.N.D.

"Natsu?" Gray spoke, forcing him out of his thoughts. "Natsu, Natsu are you okay? Talk to me.."

E.N.D was a monster, Natsu was a monster. Made to be a killer, made to slay and leave dust in his trail. Fire was bad, fire was destructive, and Natsu was a fire mage. That meant he was all of that, he was fire. Gray was ice, ice was pretty. Ice made sculptures, could cool down people and Gray was cool. He only got mad because Natsu.. Because he existed, yes? He wants to reach out and touch his face. But Natsu doesn't.

His body is tainted. It's ugly. His hands are stained from the blood of the innocent killed by the demons made to reanimate his flesh. He's disgusting, he's a monster and he needs to stop. He needs more. Is he sobering?

"Natsu.. Natsu!" Gray shook him, his hands on his shoulders and gripping quite tightly. The salamander gasps, his eyes are wide. "C'mon. You're scaring me.."

He stares at Gray's arms, and in his drunken state he felt like his taint was spreading to him. Natsu would panic, before swinging to shove both his hands back. Gray moved back, startled while Natsu would stumble backwards. His hands find a wall to keep upright, and he'd gasp in fear.

"Don't touch.. You can't.. It's spreading." Natsu whimpers, his legs give up and he'd fall onto the ground. It hurt, and he whimpered again. He'd raise his hands to show to Gray, his eyes wide and frantic. "Look, look! Zeref! Zeref! He made it! He made me again.. And now I'm all tainted, and you're touchin' me and that'll make you tainted too. I don't want you to get all tainted 'cause then I'm just spreadin' the shit Zeref made!"

Natsu can't see Gray's reaction, as he quickly pulls his arms into his chest and curled up. He pressed into the wall, his breathing would quicken dramatically and continue to do so. His body was shaking, he was sweating and suddenly all of the alcohol he drank to feel numb was making him feel really really sick.

He feels the cold touch, Natsu almost screams until he realises it is kind. It is Gray. The arms move and pull him closer. He kept curled up, but Gray didn't force him open. He held him. He protected him.

"Zeref didn't taint you.." Gray whispered to him. "Even if he did, which he didn't, you wouldn't spread it. Not to me, not to anyone. You aren't Zeref's spawn, you're Natsu. Our Natsu.." His fingers moved upwards, one hand playing with Natsu's hair but the other keeping him close. "Fiery Natsu. Our light.."

"Tainted light."

"Nah." Gray grins at him as Natsu's head would slowly raise, and he'd peer at Gray with a worried look. He'd touch his face tenderly, and slowly would wipe his tears away. "You're just what Fairy Tail needs. But you're hurting right now, and.. And I want to help you."

Natsu whimpered a little, he can only think how Gray wanted to kill him. His eyes are intense, but they're soft. They aren't the same as before, and Natsu can't understand.

"Make it stop.." Natsu pleas quietly, he feels himself tear up. He feels dizzy, he's scared. "Please, please."

"I will, I will." Gray assures him, touching Natsu's arm and pulling him close. "Just let me in.. I want to help you Natsu, but you have to let me in."

Natsu would continue to plea, they grew more silent over time as he lay in Gray's arms. His exhaustion crept up, enveloping him in sleep.

And yet, instead of nightmares..

Natsu found Gray haunted his dreams that night.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Makarov tries to get Natsu some help, but things go as well as expected. At least a certain ice mage is around.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll be honest, I'm gonna try to end this next chapter. I don't really know how to entirely continue it, since I didn't have a chapter plan written out. I did want to write something like this, so this is more like a test run it seems. I will do my best to eventually get something a bit better out, and I hope you will enjoy!

Things are changing, and Natsu doesn't understand how, or why. Whenever he gets drunk, he wakes up in Gray's apartment and Gray always has new information. What else did he know? Why didn't he use Natsu's current state to kill him? He was vulnerable, he was prey and Gray was the predator.

So why wasn't he jumping?

But he is being hunted, he knows because Gray is always there. Or someone else, and they're watching him. In his dreams, eyes and eyes are watching him. His skin cracks and breaks, all he sees is the taint. His fingers shatter and fall, the cracks travel further and further up his arms. They engulf him, they shatter him.

The mirror in front of him shows such a terrifying beast, and yet when he screams for it to leave.. It stares, and it stares. Smoke billows from shattering lips, and suddenly the cracks join to form a twisted smile. Fangs bare, laughter echoes and he's staring at himself.

True self? It's all very confusing.

Those dreams were confusing. Those dreams, he was being watched. He was being laughed at. He was being broken. But in the other ones.. They were more confusing, and he woke with his heart skipping and colour to his cheeks.

Cold arms wrap around his middle, icy breath tickling the back of his neck. In these dreams, he is laughing as Gray engulfs him. All he can smell, all he can feel, hear, everything. His senses are overloaded with Gray. His touches are electrifying and Gray looks at him with that damn confident face that has him feeling weak in the knees.

He feels vulnerable, but he doesn't feel scared. And that confused him more.

Happy bought him a new sweater. Natsu doesn't know where he got the money from, and he feels like the days are slipping past him. What has he missed? What did he miss?

The sweater is nice though. It covers him, the sleeves are slightly long and only his fingers poke out. It's comfy, and Natsu finds himself wearing it often. Especially as it got colder. He couldn't warm himself up like he used too..

What else was changing?

The cold irritates his injuries as he follows Happy to the guild. There is a lot of noise inside, more than there has and when they go inside it's lively. Natsu can see everyone bouncing, everyone is laughing and faces he felt he hasn't seen in ages are surrounding him. Makarov is able to pass through the crowd easily, going to Natsu and offering him a smile.

"Natsu, can you come with me?"

It's a weird question, and Natsu wonders briefly if he is in trouble. He doesn't argue, but he follows. Happy says he is going to find Carla so he waves him off. Makarov was talking about something he was vaguely interested in, and he finds himself in front of one of the many doors. It was the office, Natsu knew that.

"It'll only be an hour."

"An hour of what?" Natsu asked, and he could tell immediately that it was the wrong response. Makarov sighed, shaking his head.

"I was informed that you weren't feeling well Natsu." Makarov began, and the salamander had a feeling he knew who spoke. "I asked someone to come today to speak with you. If you come every week, they should be able to find a way to -"

"I don't need to talk to anyone."

Makarov watched as Natsu took a cautious step back, his features are calm and saddened while Natsu is the opposite. He's staring at the door as if someone is about to come barrelling through, his teeth bared ready to bite.

"I'm fine. I don't.. I don't need to.." He repeats the statement shakily, narrowing his eyes as he tries to solidify his statement. Makarov seems unimpressed, but simply opens the door.

"Natsu. I wouldn't do this if I wasn't concerned. You know this, right?" Natsu responds with a slow nod. This gains a smile from Makarov, and he pats his arm. "Go think about it. I'll let them know."

The salamander is quick to retreat, ignoring the creak of wood as Makarov entered his office. Instead, he quickly goes down the stairs and scanned the room. Upon spotting the familiar mop of black hair, Natsu quickly stalks towards him.

"Oi, ice face!" He exclaimed, and around him the guild quietens just slightly. They're watching, but Natsu doesn't notice. Instead, his attention is fixated on Gray who looks at him with his dumb face.

Gray merely perks an eyebrow, while beside him Lucy smiles. The action makes Natsu want to punch him, why is he acting so casual?! He told!

"You're comin' with me." Natsu snarls, and he grabs Gray to drag him out. He doesn't fight it, just follows willingly. Meanwhile, Lucy calls a quick 'hey! nice to see you too!'

Natsu responds with a yell of 'hello!' back.

\--

  
There is no mistaking that Natsu is crashing, and Gray doesn't want to see him burn. It's wrong to basically follow Natsu, he knows that but he doesn't know if the salamander even remembers how to care for himself. In fact, Gray isn't sure if Natsu sleeps when he isn't drunk off his ass.

What was once sunkissed skin was almost ashen, dark circles plagued once vibrant eyes. His hair is a mess, and he's lost weight. When Gray looked at Natsu, he saw a fighter losing a battle. He saw someone who needed him, even if he never voiced it sober.

Maybe it was wrong to get the guildmaster involved, especially knowing how passionate he was of his children. Yet Gray needed to know how to help Natsu, the salamander had pleaded for his aid. Gray couldn't ignore it.

_'Be there for him, let him know he isn't alone'._

"Why the hell did you tell Gramps?!"

Natsu practically exploded when they exited the guild, glaring at Gray as they walked. Gray would sigh, the words that Natsu used to describe himself flood to mind. He needs to stay calm.

"You're hurting Natsu, I'd be blind not to see that." Gray pointed out, hand on his hip. Natasu would recoil slightly, and was rearing to snap back before he was silent. "Natsu, just look at yourself. I've lost count of the amount of times I've dragged your drunk ass back to my house to rest."

"I never asked you to do that."

"You don't have to. You're my friend." It hurt to say that, he wanted to be more but he wouldn't push these feelings onto Natsu. Not while he was like this. Natsu's own gaze softens, and he brings his arms together. He doesn't meet Gray's gaze, and he takes a step forward.

"I know I shouldn't have asked gramps. I just needed advice." He murmurs, reaching to touch Natsu's arm. He notices the slight flinch, and he relaxes his touch. Gray watches Natsu for any sign of discomfort, before rubbing gentle and hopefully soothing circles onto the fabric with his thumb. "I want to help you, I shouldn't push you. I know that, I just need you to know that you're not alone."

He leans a little closer, hoping to catch Natsu's eye. "You're not alone Natsu, you know that. Don't you?"

"Why haven't you killed me?"

The question causes Gray to recoil, his grip tightening a little out of shock. Natsu looked at Gray, and his expression made the ice mage want to cry.

He was _scared._

Scared of _him._

"You're supposed to kill me. Zeref ain't dead until I am." Natsu spoke, his gaze dropping to their arms. "You're supposed to be afraid of me. I'm E.N.D, I'm the big bad monster that Zeref created. You said you'd kill me."

Gray's gaze would soften slightly, though held a hint of pain. Right. It seemed that Natsu was still worried about this, and it was awful to know that Natsu felt that he should be in danger. Did he think he had to die?

"No, no. Natsu.. I'm not going to." Gray assured him, repeating the gesture of rubbing the circles into his arm. "Natsu, it isn't your fault."

Carefully, the ice mage would watch Natsu's expression for any changes be it positive or negative. He waited, watching Natsu growing more confused and still there was that panic.

All he wanted to do was freeze that fear, but his magic didn't work like that.

Instead, he hushes Natsu softly and pulls him into a hug. He gives Natsu the chance to run, but he doesn't. The male is still tense, his arms tremble and all Gray can do to hopefully help him is to coo to him.

So he continues. He coos to Natsu, he shushes him and he talks as fondly as he can. Gray knows that love he has for the salamander seeps with each statement, but Gray cannot stop. Not until he knows Natsu has relaxed.

And eventually, he does.

\--

Natsu won't understand Gray. He doesn't think he can, or ever will. His words and assurances were so sweet yet Natsu knows he shouldn't have it. He is the monster, he is all that is wrong in this world.

Instead of destroying him, Gray holds him and spoke to him like he was a precious being. Someone who wasn't evil, wasn't infested by a brother's magic.

Natsu does relax. His defences falter, but his walls don't collapse. He stays in Gray's arms, the thump of his heart beat soothing to him.

"I don't wanna talk to some stranger." Natsu admits softly.

"You don't ever really talk to anyone about your issues." Gray reminds him just as softly, one hand finding its way to pink locks. "They need to come out for it to feel better.."

Natsu huffed. He knew Gray was right. In order for things to get better, he had to talk about it. But, he couldn't or at least, didn't know how to. There was so much, and it felt easier to let it fester and eat him alive than let the world see.

"I'll be here to support you, alright?" Gray says, rubbing Natsu's shoulders. Natsu can't help but wonder if Gray was always so physically affectionate, but as someone who always was it didn't bother him. "That way you don't have to get drunk constantly."

"I don't think anyone deals with their issues healthily.. You included."

"Well, we can aspire to huh?"

That response got a bit of a laugh from Natsu. He shook his head, looking at Gray with an amused expression. The fear of having to talk to someone he barely knew about personal issues made his stomach churn uncomfortably, but he feels light too.

And when Gray pulls away from the hug to laugh a little, Natsu swears he can fly.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A relatively short chapter to end it off. I want to thank everyone who left comments, I have read and appreciated all of them. Thank you as well for the kind criticism, I will try to keep it in mind for future projects.
> 
> I cannot guarantee when another project will start, or if it will be a multichapter. I may have some oneshots for the future, I am planning something that will take time to complete and I do hope you enjoy!
> 
> I am doing my best! And I hope you enjoy! If you ever want to talk, you can find me under adridoot on tumblr. I cannot guarantee fast replies, but that will be where I am.

Things are different. They will always be different. Scars of the past always lurking, but healing and despair is broken gradually by cracks of hope.

He's learning to cope. Its difficult, he rather chase alcohol and fight until he's unfixable. But, he's doing it. He's going to therapy, he's opening up more. It's easier to talk, easier to accept help from his fellow guildmates.

They only said nothing because of who Natsu was. He didn't deal with these things before. He buries his negativity, hides it under lock and key. Natsu didn't let himself dwell on the dark emotions, but sometimes it's needed and smiling seems so much brighter afterwards.

Sometimes he messes up. Sometimes he falls apart. That doesn't change. He has bad days, but they've gradually become more infrequent over time and with it his nightmares die down too.

Natsu shifted, feeling Gray's arms around him. While he had gained support from his guild mates, Happy and surprisingly Gray were the most crucial. That is not to say that the other members support was unwelcome, their constant presence and reassurances helped.

He leaned his head back, listening to Gray's soft exhale.

Natsu feels comfortable, it's been a long time since he's felt like that. Safety blossoms in his chest, and brings forth comfort to weary battle scars. He let out a quiet hum, shutting his eyes.

Things have changed. That isn't bad.

"You feelin' good?" Gray asked, his cold breath tickling Natsu's ear a little. The salamander nods, and Gray seems satisfied with the response.

They've changed. There is a difference in their relationship, but there is no word to it. There haven't labelled it, and Natsu finds himself content with this. There is gentle brushes replacing fists, exchanged glances of a thousand words but neglecting anger and a presence neither intolerable or dangerous.

Natsu is safe. Natsu is E.N.D.

But that's okay, because a title doesn't define him. A position granted to him, a name that he knew not about was not his identity. He is Natsu Dragneel, the salamander of Fairy Tail and a healing warrior.

He yawned, his jaw cracking lightly in the process. Gray stirs a little, but he did not seem bothered. Instead, he just pressed his nose against Natsu's scarf. The rough material scratches against his neck, and Natsu laughs. Bright and bubbly.

Things are better.

And Natsu found himself eager to face the future again.


End file.
